There are some things that children do that fill a parent with pride, like learning to cover their mouth when they sneeze. Yet, there is always something to balance the equation, like wiping their hand on your pant leg afterwards.
I have been working with Mason for some time now to cover his mouth when coughing and sneezing with mixed results. Mason was sneezing and coughing on anything and everything that may have been in his hands or directly in front of him. Occasionally when he sits on my lap, he will turn his head to look at me with that look he gets just before he sneezes…you know the one I’m talking about, mouth slightly open, eyes squinted with one smaller than the other and nose all scrunched up. I know that is my cue to close my mouth tightly as he is about to blow. A lesson to add to the “what not to do” list. That was a lesson I only had to experience once. Anyway, after a short pause, the sneeze gets released leaving me sitting there with…well you know…all over my face and glasses. Time for him to start learning to cover his mouth.
I set out on a mission to teach him to cover his mouth whenever he coughs or sneezes. I decided to start with the sneezing considering the types of projectiles that can be released through a sneeze. Not pleasant when they are headed in my direction. I started out simply telling him to cover his mouth after each sneeze. To my shegrin, that is exactly what he did, covered his mouth AFTER each sneeze. Sigh. Okay, so we at least have the concept, time to focus on the execution.
It was kind of entertaining watching the progression that Mason went through. After some more work and instruction, he would sneeze then cover his mouth and do two or three fake sneezes. Yeah, you read right, fake sneezes. I am still not really sure what the point was of him going ‘aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhccccccchhhhhoooooooo’ so dramatically into his hand, but I wasn’t going to risk correcting him on it. At this point I get the impression that he understands what he is supposed to but just doesn’t remember in time for the actual sneeze. Fortunately, the lead time on one of his sneezes, where he makes that weird face, is usually long enough for me to remind him. Finally, progress.
As time passed, Mason started covering his mouth before each sneeze. This was a great development in my eyes. Unfortunately, as I mentioned earlier, there is always something to balance the equation. While Mason was covering his mouth, he was now pushing the palm of his hand very hard over his mouth. You may be thinking, so what, who cares. Being an engineer, I tend to over analyze things to my wife’s dismay and terrible frustration at times. Of course I have analyzed the process of sneezing and have come to certain conclusions on the proper sneezing technique. Try to bear with me for a minute. Basically, the purpose of covering your mouth during a sneeze is not to stop the sneeze, but redirect it. Obviously, when someone sneezes, there is a lot of force behind it that projects…um, stuff…into the air. Without covering the mouth the…stuff…gets spread out in to the room. By covering the mouth, the…stuff…gets directed into the hand and reduces the airborne particles.
Back to Mason covering his mouth too tightly with his hand during a sneeze. This causes his sneeze to blow up in his face, literally. Uggg, how disgusting! Luckily, I taught Mason a neat trick to clean his face after such an event, to Laura’s disapproving glares mind you. I told Mason that he has two shirt sleeves which are an excellent substitution for a Kleenex. Now when he sneezes with his hand too tight over his mouth, he smears his forearm across his face to clean up. That is all fine and good as long as he has on long sleeves. While Laura glares at me every time she sees Mason do the arm wipe and sniffle technique, she did get a good laugh the day he had on short sleeves. I was sitting in my easy chair, heard Mason sneeze in the other room and do his wipe and sniffle technique. Of course, Laura shot me a disapproving look from the couch. I heard him say, eeewww. I chuckled to myself knowing that he had on short sleeves that day. However, my laughter quickly ended, and Laura started uncontrollably laughing when he walked up to me and wiped his arm on my leg. Huh, that kinda backfired. The worst part was Laura’s laughter at the whole situation. I am not sure that the pointing was necessary either.
