Finally, home from work and boy could I go for a snack. I wonder what we have to eat in the cabinet that won’t ruin my supper. Hmmm, sugary snacks, a different colored sugary snack, chocolate flavored bear shaped crackers…I wonder if a four year old lives here? Wait, I see something that looks promising…clear in the back…hidden away from prying eyes…Yes, score! Chocolate chip cookies!
The package seems a little light though; I hope there are a few left. Okay, so I have to be really quiet getting this crinkly package open so Mason does not hear me. Slowly, slowly, careful now, not too fast. SHHHH! Perhaps I should move this operation upstairs so the noise cannot be detected by the ‘all hearing’ child. I should probably stick the package under my shirt so he does not see me with it. The lengths I have to go to just to eat a cookie…
Crap that packaging is loud plus there is only one cookie left. Good thing I planned ahead and came up here as to not draw attention to myself. Oh, little cookie, how tasty you will be…
Uh-oh, what’s that? Someone is coming up the stairs.
“Daddy?”
SH$&!!! WHAT DO I DO NOW? Here, the cookie can hide under the pillow, but what about the packaging?
“Daddy?”
Quickly, just throw it under the blankets! Phew, that was close. “I’m in here Mason”.
“Hi Daddy.”
“Hi Mason, how are you? What’cha doin’?”
“I jump bed.”
“No, get off the bed before you…” CRUNCH, CRINKLE “…step on something.”
“What that?”
“Oh that. Nothing you need to worry about Mason. Hey, put that cover back down! You don’t need what’s under there.”
“COOKIE!!”
D’oh! “Sorry Mason, it’s empty. No cookies.” Wait, why is he looking around the room? No, don’t move the pillooooh crap…”Mason that’s my cookie”.
“My cookie.”
“No, my cookie!”
“My COOKIE!”
“No Mason!! My cookie!”
“MY COOKIE!!”
“Mason, that is my cook…” Wait, am I seriously arguing with a four year old? For Pete’s sake, it’s my cookie and I am going to eat it!!
“MOOOOOMMMMYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!”
Oh darn…”Fine, here’s your stinking cookie”.
Sheesh, outwitted by the driver of this crazy train again. All I wanted was a small chocolate chip cookie to sustain me until supper. But NOOOO, I have to share everything with Mason, and when I say ‘share’ I really mean hand over never to be seen again. Oh well, maybe I can sneak some of those chocolate flavored bear shaped crackers…
Tags: Cookie
